Relationships Aren't Everything

[dufus]

I haven't been here long, but I've noticed many people here seem to be so upset over the fact that they're not dating. Don't get me wrong, dating can be a great thing, but it can also be one of the most emotionally disturbing, heart wrenching relationships you can ever enter. Almost over rated at times.

Everyone is so concerned about finding someone to "love". I swore I "loved" my last 3 girlfriends to death, and maybe I did in some way, but they all came and went. They weren't right for me. Call it fate, destiny, whatever you want. But when it comes down to it, heartbreak is a depressing part of life. And I can almost guarantee that everyone will experience it at LEAST once.

The moral? Don't rush yourselves. Just jumping into relationships because you feel you need someone to lean on, love, cherish will only lead to heartache. Sure there's that one in a billion chance you'll fall right into the arms of your "soul-mate", but those odds are hard to hit.

I guess, just pace yourself. I'm not saying all this because I think I'm some "relationship expert". I've just been there. I was that guy that jumped into things too quickly. Because I needed to fill that "void" that I never even knew existed. To this day I am still emotionally scared from being burnt too many times.

Seek out someone that you are not only attracted to, but are compatible with. Don't just date. Create a friendly relationship with the person first. If you can't be friends, you'll never make it as a couple.

Just some thoughts.

[Child of Bodom]

Wise words my friend... wise words...

[FUBAR]

truly those are wise words, but it doesnt work too well for my situation since im bordering on depression and all i really want is someone to be there :tongue: . And heartbreak whatever gotta take the good and the bad and if i can get some good out of a relationship and some happy times, its well worth it, cause im not finding good times much elsewhere

[RGN-dRaGoN]

This is kinda like the saying is it better to be loved and looze it or not be loved at all? and to tell u the truth i cant asnwer that ques. however, dufus, u gave me alot 2 think about... it kinda makes me feel better.. that it doesnt have 2 be NOW to get into a relationship its just a matter of time..

[Reqium]

This is kinda like the saying is it better to be loved and looze ir or not be loved at all?

Wow. I believe its " Its better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all.
And yeah good wisdom.

[Child of Bodom]

Yeah, Reqiums right on the quote. It's better to love someone and lose them to experience the feeling of love, than to miss out on it and miss out on one of the best feelings in the world

[Unforgiven]

Wow. I believe its " Its better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all.
And yeah good wisdom.

"better to have loved and lost and commit suicide cause of that loss, than to have never loved at all."

enjoy the single life while you can

[Child of Bodom]

Whats so bad about not being single?

[Halfpintrocker]

I always have a gf and/or bf... so... It dont matter to me... but when i am single... It rocks... yet i think I like haveing a bf and gf better... I have the hottest gf and bf around so... I am happy...

[RGN-dRaGoN]

I always have a gf and/or bf... so... It dont matter to me... but when i am single... It rocks... yet i think I like haveing a bf and gf better... I have the hottest gf and bf around so... I am happy...

neh.. this was kinda like ur last post in not having a g/f b/f lol... o and i found out u r bisexual.. wich 4 a hot gurl (if u are hot that is) i think is kool.. getting off topic tho, im gonna answer my own ques about the to be loved and looze it or never be loved at all.. i think it is better to be loved cuase at least u had it at least u had ur moments of grattitude... for the one that dint love b4 has nothing.. not even memorys

[Child of Bodom]

neh.. this was kinda like ur last post in not having a g/f b/f lol... o and i found out u r bisexual.. wich 4 a hot gurl (if u are hot that is) i think is kool.. getting off topic tho, im gonna answer my own ques about the to be loved and looze it or never be loved at all.. i think it is better to be loved cuase at least u had it at least u had ur moments of grattitude... for the one that dint love b4 has nothing.. not even memorys


... You just figured that out? i knew that when she first said "b/f or g/f"...
Oh, and Rock on! couldnt agree more with ya. It IS better to have loved and lost, at least you could remember all the fun it was.

[chubz]

truly those are wise words, but it doesnt work too well for my situation since im bordering on depression


thats y we have friends. . . but still i see your point

and i think u should have a little bit of expireince with the bad to make to good, or learn from mistakes

[RGN-dRaGoN]

neim a lil | | bit slow compared the average | | person, o well, lol

[Unforgiven]

... You just figured that out? i knew that when she first said "b/f or g/f"...
Oh, and Rock on! couldnt agree more with ya. It IS better to have loved and lost, at least you could remember all the fun it was.

meh... i wouldn't know

[dbmott]

Sorry but I totally and 100% disagree. Relationships are almost everything. When you feel down and pure shitty, you know that there is someone out there that truly cares for you. I was in school and it was reaaallly starting to suck, my grades were dropping because I was totally losing steam because of the end of the year and I was exhausted, my family was having problems, I was getting into and still am getting into huge fights with some of my best friends, my job sucked ass and still does, I had nothing to do, no one would give an ear, except for my girlfriend, who was there for me, and I love her for that. Yes she is an ex now but we are actually still friends, and being in love is one of the greatest feelings in the world. Knowing that no matter what happens to you, there is someone still out there that will love and listen to you.

Peace out.

EDIT: yes someone mentioned something about friends, well you can't have intimate relations (having sex) with your friends, that would be screwed up. Friends are for hanging out with and having fun, I think friendships are ruined when you try and do to much while trying to stay in the "friends" zone.

[TheLampIncident]

Sometimes not having anything good to look at in life is satisfying because you can come to forums like this and bitch all day about your problems. Being down and out makes you a much smarter person, because you know from experience what not to do. You don't need relationships for shit.

[Magnum]

it's still possible to get most of what u look for in a relationship w/ out being in a relationship

[FUBAR]

it's still possible to get most of what u look for in a relationship w/ out being in a relationship
yea but hookers cost alot of money...well the non diseased ones..last time i pay 5 bucks i tell you that much

[Child of Bodom]

Sorry but I totally and 100% disagree. Relationships are almost everything. When you feel down and pure shitty, you know that there is someone out there that truly cares for you. I was in school and it was reaaallly starting to suck, my grades were dropping because I was totally losing steam because of the end of the year and I was exhausted, my family was having problems, I was getting into and still am getting into huge fights with some of my best friends, my job sucked ass and still does, I had nothing to do, no one would give an ear, except for my girlfriend, who was there for me, and I love her for that. Yes she is an ex now but we are actually still friends, and being in love is one of the greatest feelings in the world. Knowing that no matter what happens to you, there is someone still out there that will love and listen to you.

Peace out.

EDIT: yes someone mentioned something about friends, well you can't have intimate relations (having sex) with your friends, that would be screwed up. Friends are for hanging out with and having fun, I think friendships are ruined when you try and do to much while trying to stay in the "friends" zone.


Rock on dude

[RGN-dRaGoN]

yea i felt the same way, if only i had some1 to understand me, if only i had some1 to tell me to look up instead of pushing my head down. if i had some1 to pick me up after all these hard punches life has gaven me. i truely wish for i G/F but i had no courage, no confidence, because if she will turn me down i will be the person loozer who asked out a hot gurl and got put down. it will just make me more depressed. and i dont know how much i can take sometimes

[Kays28]

I don't know if this has been said or not. But i am glad i have taken all the bad that i have in life cause once you get the good it makes it just that much sweeter. I presume that if you get lucky and get the good right away you don't know how good you have it,

[arrogantbastard]

I have had some pretty fucked up gf's, but I still think having a gf is nice just to have someone to be there to talk to about anything. Plus now i know what not to look for in a gf.

[Fred]

This is kinda like the saying is it better to be loved and looze ir or not be loved at all? try it...

[magnolia]

two words for this post, whiskey lullabye. (song)

[crazyking158]

Originally Posted by RGN-dRaGoN
This is kinda like the saying is it better to be loved and looze ir or not be loved at all.

I just wanted to put my two cents in. I totaly disagree because I love a girl in my life more then anything in the world, after three years she called it off, and its scared me since, ive been unable to open up to antother, girl, still a year later! NOw if only i didnt konw what love felt like, iwouldnt being good through this eh?

[mariusthegreat]

Love is one of the riskiest endeavours one jumps into...in life one makes plans and tries to tackle them down how ever possible....you are in control in much of what happens.....ex: you plan on being an engineer...but grades suck..thats your fault....you plan on buying an expensive car...yet waste all your money on booze....your fault.....you plan on going to school..and getting a nice job afterwards [more than likely you will if you got a degree] ...your well doing....but when it comes down to grls...guys..falling in love..finding a soul mate...you open up your heart...you let all these other feelings in that you never thought you had....you are letting someone in you..in your heart...you dont plan on doing it...you dont plan on letting someone take 50% of you..cuz thats how it should be...50/50.....then it seems its working out..and you get owned....or she gets owned....that 50% of you is gone....you loose that...and you turn back....you look at what happened...and you hadnt planned for it...the flurry of butterflies in your stomach are now gone....and you dont know what to do without them....it sucks...as many of you know...as i know....
So in the end its a risk...and to be honest..i think it is a risk worth taking....good luck yo's

[desolation]

Why is it that everyone wants someone in their lives?

My 2 cents....

You can't be happy with someone else until you are happy with yourself.

I hate it when people think that just haveing someone else in their life will fix all their problems. WAKE UP people. You are still the same person regardless, someone with you might bring out more good or bad qualities, but those qualities are still there. No one person is great enough to turn your entire life around, quit focusing on "love" (which is bullshit) and just focus on enjoying life.

[Fred]

love is a curse, a disease, it takes u over then destroys u if u let it, or it makes u the happiest person alive, i guess alot of the time its like alcohol or drugs u drink/take it and ur happy and then it wears off and u get depressed. Love is fucked, cant live with it, cant live without it, its the same with woman, anyone hear ever wished they were gay? I dont, she means more to me than anything, but man she is so confusing. When u are in a relationship everything just gets turned upside down, flipped around, overall it just gets fucked up, so u end up confused, so u say fuck it and try and get over them but then u cant and it ends up tearing u apart...u cant stop it, its inevitable

[fez]

[QUOTE=dbmott]Sorry but I totally and 100% disagree. Relationships are almost everything. When you feel down and pure shitty, you know that there is someone out there that truly cares for you. I was in school and it was reaaallly starting to suck, my grades were dropping because I was totally losing steam because of the end of the year and I was exhausted, my family was having problems, I was getting into and still am getting into huge fights with some of my best friends, my job sucked ass and still does, I had nothing to do, no one would give an ear, except for my girlfriend, who was there for me, and I love her for that. Yes she is an ex now but we are actually still friends, and being in love is one of the greatest feelings in the world. Knowing that no matter what happens to you, there is someone still out there that will love and listen to you.

Peace out.




ur right in a way... but still if u can stand on ur own through troubled waters without having to rely on another to bare the weight....ur that much stronger...how can we be fully confident of our own abilities through life if we can't depend on ourselves? An ear is helpful...but when u can solve your misfortunes on your own....that's divine

[Unforgiven]

love hurts, love scars,
love wounds, and marks,
any heart, not tough,
or strong, enough
to take a lot of pain,
take a lot of pain
love is like a cloud
holds a lot of rain
love hurts, ooh ooh love hurts

I'm young, I know,
but even so
I know a thing, or two
I learned, from you
I really learned a lot,
really learned a lot
love is like a flame
it burns you when it's hot
Love hurts, ooh ooh love hurts

some fools think of happiness
blissfulness, togetherness
some fools fool themselves I guess
they're not foolin' me

I know it isn't true,
I know it isn't true
love is just a lie,
made to make YOU BLUE
love hurts, ooh,ooh love hurts
ooh,ooh love hurts

[Guitar solo]

I know it isn't true,
I know it isn't true
love is just a lie,
made to make YOU BLUE
love hurts, ooh ooh love hurts
ooh ooh love hurts

[durtytoothbrush]

Why is it that everyone wants someone in their lives?

My 2 cents....

You can't be happy with someone else until you are happy with yourself.

I hate it when people think that just haveing someone else in their life will fix all their problems. WAKE UP people. You are still the same person regardless, someone with you might bring out more good or bad qualities, but those qualities are still there. No one person is great enough to turn your entire life around, quit focusing on "love" (which is bullshit) and just focus on enjoying life.

I totally agree with you dude I was waiting for someone to sat that. The more you start depending on your "significant other" the more unattractive you seem to them. Independance is so attractive and love always comes when you aren't looking for it. I think that you have to have your shit together and know who you are before you go trying to "give half" of yourself to a partner.
and don't ever not do something because you are afraid. Asking someone out is like going to a job interview- they either want you or they don't but you have to keep trying or you'll never get business. - if they turn you down it wasn't meant to be and maybe there is someone even hotter or more like you that will say yes, but if you just give up you will never know.

it drives me crazy how people sit around and wait for things to happen to them (i do the same thing). In reality, you have a 50/50 chance if you try and a 0% chance if you don't.

hmm... i should stop before i write a novel here

[Fred]

I just wish she had said no to me and then maybe I wouldnt be so fucked up, unfortunately she didnt say no or yes and I just got so fucking confused and im just totally fucked up now...

[Tigredragon]

You know, I thought it was me. Honestly and foretruly thought it was me. Yes, I am a loser, a very ugly woman, have only had 3 bf's in my life...1 of those who actually considered himself as my bf...but I look at all the people who have relationships around me, how much they fuss and fight, get lied to and cry about everything...my Goddess! It's just too much! And even though at some times I do get extremely lonely and long for human companionship..all in all, it's perfectly alright for someone to not have a relationship and be..ok. I have always said this, and probably always will, I would much rather be alone for the rest of my life then to be with someone that doesn't treasure me as much as I treasure them...and that's very hard to find.

I'm not much of a talker, so this is pretty much how well I get my words across, but I just wanted to say thanks to all of you who posted to this thread, it made me feel a little more sane. Just a little.

[Unforgiven]

a wise woman once told me "There's more to life than love."

that's true... relationships aren't everything... however, it helps to have somebody to talk to... to confide in... i've been down the road of lonliness for 19 years... i started to like it. but i had nobody to talk to. i wrote down my thoughts... my emotions. but now i have somebody there for me, as i am there for her. single people, be happy, not-single people, appreciate the person you're with. that's all i gotta say.